David Oliver: How can we plan for old age if we won't discuss it honestly?

Media depictions of ageing have become polarised. On the one hand we have skydiving grannies, marathon running granddads, and national treasures such as Judi Dench and David Attenborough. And then we have “The Elderly”—hapless victims of neglect, passive recipients of care, burdens on public services, and part of a “grey tsunami.” Over the past few months, an avalanche of articles and books has told us how to stave off ageing and remain as fit as we can for as long as we can. To paraphrase: “70 is the new 45, you’re as young as you feel, and I’m certainly not old, let alone senile or doddery.” In May a 67 year old Times columnist, Elaine Kingett, wrote about retaining her sexual life and desirability, dating and outpacing younger men. She asked why she should have to wear fleeces, forget about sex, and “look out on a desert full of internet dating geriatrics” whose idea of fun ventured no farther than a potter around a garden centre or a nap. Of course, there’s no reason not to enjoy an active sex life or dating as we age, if we choose to. And, with major inequalities in disability-free life expectancy and much potentially preventable ill health in older age, our interest in remaining fit makes sense. Who wants to be in poor health as they age, if they can avoid it? As Bette Davis said, “Old age ain’t no place for sissies!”